Life is bitter sweet....

Today marks the day I have a 5th grader..How did this happen? It feels like yesterday I was crying myself to sleep because we were having trouble getting pregnant. 3 years of tests, IUI's, standing on my head, taking my temperature, and acupuncture before we conceived our son. The day he was born, was a long painful day, but them moment I looked at him, I fell in love. I remember looking at him and thinking, I am your mom and you are my baby and nothing that happens in this world will ever change that. The love a mother has for her children runs so deep sometimes it hurts. 

Today he will walk across the stage at his elementary school and we will mark this moment that he is no longer a little boy, but growing into a pre-teen, teen and man. It is very bittersweet. I miss the days of holding him in my arms as he fell asleep, smelling his sweet baby smell. His toddler years in a diaper, running around the house with his plastic hammer, helping dad fix things. When he learned how to ride a 2 wheeler, throw a foot ball, had his first friend sleep over. These precious days are so fleeting. He is becoming his own person, and I am proud to say he has a heart of gold. He has been through things that no child should have to go through. He kept me going during cancer, and is always talking and remembering his grandma and their adventures together before she passed. 

Somedays I wonder if I am doing, saying, preaching the right things to make him a good, kind, loving person. And, maybe the trials in his early life will make him into a strong, understanding man. So, we will celebrate this day of a new chapter in his life with laughter, tears and ice cream..I know its just 5th grade..but it is a symbol of how far we have come and where we are going. Congratulations, son. You are the light of my life, and we are turning our past pain into power. Power to change the world.